I wrote another poem....could u rate it and leave comments pleez?

Question

I wrote another poem....could u rate it and leave comments pleez?
This mask I wear

Answer

Sounds like something I would have written at age . If youre around that age, Ill say its good, clear, and concise if a little too short. Ill give it an .brbrI find that most people who write poetry and post it on Yahoo Answers really need to focus more on the mechanics and originality of thought in their work, not only just the emotion. People are usually pretty good at rhyme scheme, but not much else. Writing a good poem means you have to make it sound natural and flowing, were you to read it out loud. This one, read aloud, sounds choppy, and thats to do with the fact that the lines are very short and uneven. The number of syllables in each line need to match, that is really important in making something flow nicely. brbrFor example, the beginning line of the first two verses have syllables each, but the third verse has one extra. Its not a BIG deal, but its something that can be addressed by spending time quotpolishingquot up the poem. It happens a few times in this one.brbrHope this helps.